In a match that will be remembered by pickleball fans and eye doctors alike, Ron S. & Peter D. dismantled David D. & Randy M. with a resounding 11-0, 9-11, 11-4 victory. The first set saw Ron and Peter channeling the spirits of pickleball legends past, serving up a shutout that left David and Randy wondering if they were playing with invisible paddles.

But the real story of the night was when Peter D. decided to test the durability of his face against a high-speed pickle. With the precision of a surgeon and reflexes of a sleepy cat, Peter took one for the team—right in the nose. Miraculously, the impact seemed to awaken some hidden pickleball prodigy within him, as he returned to the court with newfound vigor, sending the crowd into a frenzy of laughter and applause.

As the match drew to a close, David D. and Randy M. were left to ponder their strategy, which appeared to revolve around politely observing the ball whizzing past them. Perhaps they were just being courteous hosts? Regardless, the pickleball python duo of Ron and Peter slithered to a decisive win, leaving David and Randy to plan their next move—likely a trip to the local optometrist.